WHO KNEW IT WAS A "PAY TO PLAY" DEAL!
WEDNESDAY! HUMPDAY! Okay everybody, by now you know that means you're not only "over the hump," but you also have to find a partner (preferably human or blow-up) and H_MP! Whew! Who knew it would be so difficult to train all of you in the two important things about Wednesdays - over the hump and also you get to h_mp! See, now you can write off the cost of this site (oh yeah, we don't charge - DAMN!) as an educational expense on your taxes.
Speaking of expenses - it does cost a few bucks to keep this site running. It's not like its allot, and our sponsor Budweiser (we love ya Bud - you are the undisputed "King of Beers!") does send us regular checks that don't bounce and we can cash for only an 8% fee at the RanchMart, but here's the deal. Those bastards at the ISP that host our web address (technical stuff) cut us off yesterday for non-payment! Look, usually we get a bill collector or two banging our trailer door when we miss a payment (or two or a year's worth), but what's all this "Denial of Service" bullsh_t preventing us from logging on yesterday?
When we originally signed up with those capitalist techno-pigs we used a credit card we found in the bathroom at the world famous Palm Canyon Roadhouse (yes, on "the" Palm Canyon Drive, baby!). That was two years ago and who knew the fool that left it there (along with an small opened foil package - ya know what we mean?) would ultimately sober up, realize her card was gone and cancel it? Anyway, yesterday was apparently website renewal day and when the $9.95 charge for two more years of service was denied by VISA - well out went the internet lights. We had to scramble, get some cans & bottles from the dumpster and send a Western Union MoneyGram to get our access restored for another 24 months. Folks, if we still had that $9.95 we could buy a pitcher or two of ice cold Budweiser. As it is, we're gonna have to cozy up to a bartender somewhere, have Stacy spread around a few free squeezers and get the beer flowing...
BASTARDS! They actually wanted us to pay to log in! No problem - we pay most of our bill with Western Union!
Guess we won't be using her card anymore! Besides, the internet is full of free porn!
Speaking of expenses - it does cost a few bucks to keep this site running. It's not like its allot, and our sponsor Budweiser (we love ya Bud - you are the undisputed "King of Beers!") does send us regular checks that don't bounce and we can cash for only an 8% fee at the RanchMart, but here's the deal. Those bastards at the ISP that host our web address (technical stuff) cut us off yesterday for non-payment! Look, usually we get a bill collector or two banging our trailer door when we miss a payment (or two or a year's worth), but what's all this "Denial of Service" bullsh_t preventing us from logging on yesterday?
When we originally signed up with those capitalist techno-pigs we used a credit card we found in the bathroom at the world famous Palm Canyon Roadhouse (yes, on "the" Palm Canyon Drive, baby!). That was two years ago and who knew the fool that left it there (along with an small opened foil package - ya know what we mean?) would ultimately sober up, realize her card was gone and cancel it? Anyway, yesterday was apparently website renewal day and when the $9.95 charge for two more years of service was denied by VISA - well out went the internet lights. We had to scramble, get some cans & bottles from the dumpster and send a Western Union MoneyGram to get our access restored for another 24 months. Folks, if we still had that $9.95 we could buy a pitcher or two of ice cold Budweiser. As it is, we're gonna have to cozy up to a bartender somewhere, have Stacy spread around a few free squeezers and get the beer flowing...
BASTARDS! They actually wanted us to pay to log in! No problem - we pay most of our bill with Western Union!
Guess we won't be using her card anymore! Besides, the internet is full of free porn!
You both need to be locked up. Thats right, put away! You have a serious mental illness! You're not right.. You two are getting worse than a couple of loonie tunes and we can't believe you're allowed in the general public. People must be figuring you both out by now - somebody must want to commit you silly bastards. Remember always, no matter what your state of mind, we cannot help but love you two.
guy and cary.
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