SATURDAY, BABY and we're talking Helsinki, Finland!  We cruised into town on the train last night (from "Russia with Love" - thank you James Bond!!) and lets just say that after almost a month crossing China, Mongolia and Siberia, being in Finland is like being in Oklahoma City (except everybody here graduated from high school, didn't marry their sisters and have most of their teeth). Folks, there's nothing like being in a place where the light bulbs are brighter than 25 watts, you can drink the water without fear of death and the toilet paper doesn't disintegrate in your hand (when there is toilet paper!).

So much for the plus side, lets chat about some "issues" that we see here in Finland that just have to be changed.  Take sunlight for example.  Better yet, take it 24 hours an f'ing day!  It never gets dark here (except in the winter when it never gets light - go figure!).  The light thing is fine for sitting around at outside pubs and bars until 2 or 3 in the morning drinking Budweiser (shameless plug for our loyal sponsor - thanks for Western Union "money-wire" by the way, it covered the bail in Moscow just fine!), but it's a real bitch trying to sleep at 3am when it's broad daylight and has never gotten dark.  And another thing, everybody here has blue eyes!  We're not sure, but that's gotta be a dietary thing, right?  It's cool, but also sorta freaky when you look around a pub (in the freakin' daylight at 2am!) and all the eyes are a bloodshot bright blue!

But let's not put out so much negative energy (bad karma, baby!).  Let's talk about Finland's contributions to the world.  So, what about those GREAT Finnish automobiles...oh yeah, that's Germany.  Okay, what about all the high tech stuff they invent and manufacture...sh_t, that's Japan.  WAIT!  GOT IT - What about Finnish fashion?  DAMN, that's Italy.  Okay, so Finland's contribution to the world is basically reindeer, but you know what?  When you come from Siberia (or Arkansas) indoor running water, electric lights and toilet paper are enough of a contribution for us - oh, and also cold beer...

           VIDEO IS BACK!  4 PICS TODAY AND VIDEO FROM FINLAND! (God bless internets that aren't dial up!)

      
If unions are so much better, why can't they spell?                  VOLVO!  Building the "safest" backhoes in the world!

      
Why couldn't the sign just say "bus stop?"              Shoulda told these guys that size matters - HA! made you look!

                                                                 VIDEO BABY!  JUST CLICK ON THE ARROW!