GAMBLING IS A TAX ON PEOPLE WHO ARE BAD AT MATH!
THURSDAY! - FRIDAY EVE! This is it - it's the official beginning of the weekend! Well okay, maybe a few of you still have to go to work today and tomorrow, but you always could call in sick (you don't need a written doctor's note until you're out at least 3 days - it's in your union contract!), or you could claim it's a "hostile work environment" (because the 19 year old receptionist won't put out and is rude when you hit on her), or better yet, just go out on a "stress leave!" They have to hold your job open for you, they can't call you at home and you're protected under the Family Medical Leave Act! Believe us, we've been on stress leave from our last job since 1996! We are nothing if not experts at Human Resource scams.
Speaking of being experts, we hitched a ride with our friend Mike here in New Orleans today and rode over to Gulfport, Mississippi. Why leave the French Quarter, the 3 for 1 Budweisers and the titty bars where we usually can get a few free "thigh plants" you ask? One word - CASINOS! That's right folks, we're talking about riverboat gambling. This is the stuff that made Mark Twain and it could make us too! And in Marko's time he couldn't play Keno and eat at a $5.95 buffet either - we live in such exciting times!
Everything was going fine (we'd only lost about $40 of our$50 dollar stake) when Stacy hit a 7-spot with five numbers! Folks, now we're talking BIG BUCKS! It paid 10 to 1 and Stacy had a $2 card so that was a quick $20 bucks in our pockets. Now figure that return out! Let's see, we won $20 on $40 dollars invested (lost) so that's 50%! OH YEAH, BABY! Try getting a 50% return from your cheap-ass mutual fund! We quit while we were ahead, hit the lunch buffet (pocketed a few pieces of cake for later!) and then cruised back to New Orleans with Mike at wheel wishing he could get investment returns like us...
Gulfport, Mississippi! Home of, of, of.....CASINOS! The local "club" was hiring so Stacy put in her application!
Guess what Kevin revealed about Stacy & her job at club! They'll never notice a few slices in Kevin's pockets!
Speaking of being experts, we hitched a ride with our friend Mike here in New Orleans today and rode over to Gulfport, Mississippi. Why leave the French Quarter, the 3 for 1 Budweisers and the titty bars where we usually can get a few free "thigh plants" you ask? One word - CASINOS! That's right folks, we're talking about riverboat gambling. This is the stuff that made Mark Twain and it could make us too! And in Marko's time he couldn't play Keno and eat at a $5.95 buffet either - we live in such exciting times!
Everything was going fine (we'd only lost about $40 of our$50 dollar stake) when Stacy hit a 7-spot with five numbers! Folks, now we're talking BIG BUCKS! It paid 10 to 1 and Stacy had a $2 card so that was a quick $20 bucks in our pockets. Now figure that return out! Let's see, we won $20 on $40 dollars invested (lost) so that's 50%! OH YEAH, BABY! Try getting a 50% return from your cheap-ass mutual fund! We quit while we were ahead, hit the lunch buffet (pocketed a few pieces of cake for later!) and then cruised back to New Orleans with Mike at wheel wishing he could get investment returns like us...
Gulfport, Mississippi! Home of, of, of.....CASINOS! The local "club" was hiring so Stacy put in her application!
Guess what Kevin revealed about Stacy & her job at club! They'll never notice a few slices in Kevin's pockets!
Kevin you keep eating all that dessert and you will have a gluteous maximus that will look like a couple of saddle bags. We see you both are back up to no good - what else is new? Have a titalating memorial weekend and remember, we cannot help but love you two.
guy and cary.
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